homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

All Registered Forum Users can participate in the writing exercises for the current fortnight.
Users can also participate in comment and constructive feedback in this Workshop.

Moderator: Shelley Hansen

Post Reply
Leonie

homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

Post by Leonie » Fri Aug 05, 2011 8:07 pm

The Flower Child
Leonie Parker © 2011

The little girl was taken from the Nudgee Orphan’s home,
and fostered by two hippies from the town.
Her hair was cropped and curly, but with tendrils that escaped
and fell across her eyes of chocolate brown.

They thought she was a keeper so adopted her in time
though often she was sickly and unwell.
Her sickness was a legacy of something in her past
the ashes of some flame no one could quell.

The hippies took their daughter to a farm at Yarraman
to treat her ills with hemp and amber beads.
The air was so much sweeter and the farm had room to grow
all the herbs a hippy couple needs.

The little girl grew stronger and she thrived as years passed.
The hippy couple thought the country air
and the herbal treatments they concocted did the trick
but it was just the love they had to spare.

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8072
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri Aug 05, 2011 8:35 pm

Aaaaaaaaaah - how nice....this one coming in from yet another angle.

Good on you Leonie - reminiscent of your youth perhaps :lol: :lol: :lol:
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

mummsie
Posts: 1062
Joined: Thu Apr 14, 2011 11:33 am
Location: Tumut, NSW

Re: homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

Post by mummsie » Fri Aug 05, 2011 8:37 pm

Good one Leonie, love the new photo.
Cheers
Sue
the door is always open, the kettles always on, my shoulders here to cry on, i'll not judge who's right or wrong.

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8072
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri Aug 05, 2011 8:42 pm

Verse 3 line 4 is one syllable short which kind of throws the rhyme off a bit it just jumped out and bit me - would this work perhaps

The hippies took their daughter to a farm at Yarraman
to treat her ills with hemp and amber beads.
The air was so much sweeter and the farm had room to grow
the special herbs a hippy couple needs.

Cheers

Maureen
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Terry
Posts: 3305
Joined: Mon Nov 01, 2010 6:53 pm

Re: homework w/e 15/8/2011 - Flower Child

Post by Terry » Fri Aug 05, 2011 9:03 pm

Hi Leonie,
Good to see a poem of yours, this one seems to have lured all back this time.

Another enjoyable read with a touching story line.

Terry

Post Reply