Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

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Catherine Lee
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Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Catherine Lee » Wed Feb 24, 2021 2:15 pm

Thanks once again Maureen, for the fresh set of prompts. This is my little flight of fancy...

Ebony Star

Angus looked belligerent – he quickly turned his head
to scan the endless grasses painted parchment, lime and gold;
sunset on the samphire cast a glowing shade of red,
whilst fluttered wisps of smoke became apparent - left him cold.

Watching as some snowy herons lifted on the breeze,
ascending from the billabong united in their flight,
acrid smell of burning bush and eucalyptus trees
assailed his nose abruptly, and aggression turned to fright.

Nervously he faced the east and combed the vast terrain,
to witness with despair increasing smoke begin to rise,
cautiously approached the fence, despite alarm and strain—
with intuition verified, dark fury filled his eyes.

Signs of recent mischief lay discarded all around—
the sight of matches, food, skin bags for water left him numb;
evidence of foolishness was patent on the ground,
and dust rose in the distance to a fading engine’s hum.

Angus raised his head and bellowed loudly to the sky—
he realised this terrifying danger had returned;
bent on saving others, hurtled back to notify,
enraged that thoughtless human beings clearly never learned!

Roos began to lead the way in panic from the fray,
determined on escape, survival now their single aim;
screeching cockatoos arose en masse and flew away,
while gusts of wind now whipped the bush and fanned each lethal flame.

Angus charged towards the mob, a race against the clock,
with single-minded focus as he willed them to survive.
Racing to their sides, he tried to turn the frantic stock,
committed to the instinct he would get them out alive.

Angus seemed demented as he worked to drive them on,
assertively controlling so their safety was ensured…
Finally the stockmen came - but meanwhile, he had shone
as leading bull of Robbo’s large and costly Angus herd.

© Catherine Lee, 2021

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Shelley Hansen
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Shelley Hansen » Fri Feb 26, 2021 7:54 am

Wow! It's a little beauty, Catherine!

I have been scratching my head over these prompts - as usual, Maureen has done a fine job in kindling the little grey cells! But this is a really imaginative and clever treatment of the subject!

Now, back to chewing my pencil and frowning ....

:? Shelley
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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri Feb 26, 2021 5:12 pm

Oh well done Catherine - thinking outside the square and I love it. Animals do have a remarkable instinct for survival and the smart ones usually do if they can - so I love that your Angus bull saved his herd from the flames. I have the same hope for our Kossi brumby Paleface that he too may have run his mob many miles from the flames to save them - so far that after 12 months he has not returned to his usual run, but our hopes are fading - so I am delighted that your poem had a positive ending. :D
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri Feb 26, 2021 5:12 pm

Come on Shelley you can do this :lol:
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

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Gary Harding
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Gary Harding » Sat Feb 27, 2021 4:16 pm

Hi Catherine...
(In my humble opinion) your verse " Ebony Star" is very good. It also appears to be a departure from your normal writing style?
It leans more toward being an exceedingly fast-moving narrative perhaps? Really interesting though!

As always, you demonstrate a remarkable repertoire of adjectives and verbs. Plus an (unmatched) ability for vivid imagery and story-telling.

Your writing passion manifests itself in the "intensity" of this poem especially.

As an aside, I have also had a few "thoughtless human beings" around here who occasionally light fires on the beach and one of those groups set the whole foreshore on fire out the back! Can you imagine waking in the night to find your bedroom walls that are normally pale blue are now a flickering orange colour!! Terrifying. So I can relate to how Angus felt!

But at least Angus won through! A very gripping tale.

The Muse has obviously been working diligently alongside you once more. Or was it the inspiring Thai food?

I am not a good commentator on the poems of others. So it is very awkward to attempt it and other than exceptions I generally do not try. However I feel fairly sure that you take my amateur observations in a good way. :)
Well done again... really good!... and please keep writing often! Gary
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Catherine Lee
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Catherine Lee » Sat Feb 27, 2021 5:33 pm

Thank you, Shelley, Maureen and Gary; I'm so glad you like it. You are so right about animals, Maureen, and it would be lovely to know that your brumby is safe and had indeed accomplished such a feat. Nothing would surprise me when it comes to the amazing instinct and nature of such creatures, and I never tire of hearing uplifting stories about them.

Gary, that is just terrible about the foreshore! I can never comprehend why people take such risks in lighting fires – or worse, light them deliberately and sit back to watch the chaos, terror and tragedy that ensues…Hmm, I don’t know about the Thai food, but perhaps a bit of extra chilli added might indeed help, who knows? Ha! I definitely needed a kick up the rear to get me writing something again, so was most grateful for Maureen’s prompts… And for the record, I do not consider your observations to be 'awkward' or 'amateur' in any way whatsoever - your feedback is as always so positive and encouraging, and I am greatly moved by your very kind compliments and nudge to write more - thank you so much!

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Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Sun Feb 28, 2021 4:11 pm

I agree with Catherine's comments Gary - everyone's observations and comments are considered valid on this site and I have always found that our lovely poets are more than capable of being constructive without resorting to being negative of others work, and all have been willing to generously share their praise and suggestions ... so please do not ever feel reticent about making a comment. We all learn and improve by sharing the insights of others, and that IMO is extremely helpful and important.

Now .... where is your poem Sunshine? Come on mate, share it - no one here bites :lol:
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
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Shelley Hansen
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Shelley Hansen » Sun Feb 28, 2021 5:34 pm

... and we know you can do it, Gary! "The Old Bush Piano" still resonates with me!!
Shelley Hansen
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"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")

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Gary Harding
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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Gary Harding » Sun Feb 28, 2021 8:21 pm

Maureen and Shelley :) ... ok well, those who can write (CL and yourselves), do so .. and others like me (GH) who mostly can't, might figure "instead, why not comment on the work of someone whose writing I have always admired. That is consistently good and is easy to follow." Whose poems are always worth the time to read. Why not indeed.

Ebony Star

Ebony Star in thirty-two brief lines capably tells a dramatic story that if told in prose might take several pages. Odd perhaps, but I consistently find something I can personally relate to in Catherine's poems. They always inspire me to pick up a pen, or rather a keyboard, and share thoughts.

This one was the terror of a fire...been there; and fought it in pj's and thongs using a garden hose.

Totally absurd and ineffective really.. but for a while I felt like a brave Firey!! What a buzz! (writing a poem about this experience would be hard as nothing useful rhymes with thongs or pyjamas)

One elegant advantage of ballads over prose is being concise in a world that demands brevity..... with the use of rhyme to drive the points home. (Rhyme is not a Crime).

Finished a Barry Humphries' autobiography. He uses so many words that I did not know. Feel ashamed of my lack of better knowledge of the English language. He was making a point I think... so today I learned "eponymous".

Anyway back to watching a foreign film on TV, reading sub-titles. If they only spoke English it would make the film much better....I wonder if they have bush ballads in Spanish?

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Re: Homework 15th March 2021 - Ebony Star

Post by Terry » Sun Feb 28, 2021 11:09 pm

G/day Catherine

Certainly a change of pace for you, and very well done again as usual.
You had me guessing there for awhile.

Looks like you're setting a cracking pace once more.

Cheers

Terry

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