ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

Goodness me, at last! I decided to go with the Petrarchan sonnet format, and have had half of it written for a couple of weeks, struggling to end it. I've gone with similar imagery to some of the rest of you - contrasting the peaceful beach scene with the memories of war. Anyway, here it is - just in time as usual!

HALONG BAY
(c) Shelley Hansen 29/9/21

She sits upon the sands of Halong Bay
and sells her fruit to people passing by
while overhead a wide and empty sky
spreads blueness on the canvas of the day.
No memories remain. No words to say
for those condemned by war to fall and die
where peace now reigns amid a distant sigh
for generations past who walked this way.
Yet she remembers how the blood ran red
and she can still recall the taste of fear
as bundled in her mother's arms they fled.
But no one knows about each dream-filled night.
So as she hears the tourist feet draw near
she turns her tear-stained eyes to face the light.

Beautifully written Shelley

You have said so much in so few words to fully paint a perfect picture.

It doesn't take long to realize just how difficult it is to write one of these well.
Like all poetry you have to learn the art, and that takes time, and lots of skill.

Terry

Wow, this was well worth the wait and your hardworking effort, Shelley!... An exceptional sonnet, with the images of the bay today blended to perfection with the poignancy of memories. Love this!

Thanks so much Terry and Catherine.

I love the Petrarchan sonnet because of its "punchiness" (is that a word?). It is less lyrical in style than the Shakespearean, I think, but its unusual rhyme scheme plus the "counter-argument" in the final sestet gives it the potential to make an impact.

Of course I love the Shakespearean too. It was my first foray into sonnets and its more conventional rhyme, plus the gradual building to the final "clincher" couplet, makes it also pretty hard to beat!

Cheers
Shelley

Yes, that is beautiful Shelley and I couldn't agree more with the previous comments! well done.
There is certainly a lot more than meets the eye with writing sonnets and easy to see that your ''being hooked'' has paid dividends!
With that said, may I be cheeky enough to offer a critique of your poem in Haiku.

Wordsmith perception
Creation extraordinaire
Sonnet masterpiece!

Ron

WOW! As always Shelley you nailed it, making great use of the prompts and also telling a very realistic story that I would lay odds really would describe the memories of many of the gentle people who live in Vietnam.

I loved the read .... is it OK if I share this to ARP as well ... as you know I try to promote ABPA there?

Thank you so much Ron and Maureen.

Yes of course Maureen - feel free to share on your Rhyming Poets Facebook page.

Wow, Ron - thank you so much for your very generous tribute. I've never had a haiku written for me before! (Come to think of it, I've never had anything written for me before!) Love it!

Cheers
Shelley