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Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 10:56 am
by Dennis N O'Brien
Group Think
It’s become quite a common affliction;
It’s a kind of cerebral restriction.
If with everyone you are agreeing
Then your powers of deduction are fleeing.
Don’t give in for you need to be strong;
Just remember the mob’s always wrong,
And when people behave just like sheep
Politicians more soundly do sleep.
© Dennis N. O'Brien, 2012
Re: Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 11:20 am
by Maureen K Clifford
I actually reckon sheep and people all have a lot in common. They are all at times contrary, bloody minded, stubborn wool gatherers , but I love them...the sheep that is and sometimes the people
Politicians would love to think that we are like sheep and follow the leader, but like sheep there are always rogues in the mob that will lead the others astray despite the best efforts of the dogs to keep them mobbed up

Re: Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 12:56 pm
by Dennis N O'Brien
Yep, gotta watch out for those rogues Maureen.

Re: Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 4:21 pm
by Neville Briggs
Not necessarily a criticism of your piece, but what you have put here reminds me of an issue that I think we should keep in mind.
I think we need to be careful putting 'sermons' into verse, the content can destroy the form. In other words, the piece can become just statements or assertions in unremarkable versifying with no poetic intention, more to do with sloganeering than poetry.
When I say not a criticism of yours, I mean it's a fine line and I can't really say about yours, but I think you are treading close to the line.
On another issue altogether, I think that some of your assertions are just not true. For example I wonder what evidence you are relying on to assert that there is some entity called 'the mob' which is always wrong ??
Just something to think about, should there be truth in poetry, does poetic license give us the privilege of creating our own facts or our own truth ??
Re: Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 7:00 pm
by Dennis N O'Brien
I thought this ditty was pretty straight forward. I don't worry about fine
lines, I just write poetry and a poem can be a complete lie as far as I'm
concerned as long as it is well constructed.
If you disagree with what this one says then write a poem to that effect.
Thanks for the comment.
Re: Group Think
Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2012 7:21 pm
by Neville Briggs
Just some thoughts. I'll leave it at that.
Re: Group Think
Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2012 12:16 pm
by LongMan
G'day Dennis,
I took a read of you work there and I see a raw political edge. I find if your gonna go there; might be nice to bring up why. Rebellious tone is better with examples of why. Other than that, I see ~ "It’s become quite a common affliction; It’s a kind of cerebral restriction." < I think if its all connected the "It's" should be "it's" after the semi-colon. Unless its an "I" or name like "John" I believe. But its only minor. But I don't believe political beings ever soundly sleep.
Would like to read more of your work.
PHIL