Teacher, teacher,
may I please have an extension of time for this topic... My poem is almost finished. but it is late (11pm and I was up at 4.45am) and if I don't want trouble I must get some sleep. So may I please hand it in tomorrow afternoon? Truly it is almost finished. Just needs a polish.
Newly Drawn
Moderator: Shelley Hansen
- Zondrae
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Newly Drawn
Zondrae King
a woman of words
a woman of words
- Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Newly Drawn
Polish away 

Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
- Zondrae
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Re: Newly Drawn
Now Marty.
I hardly ever do the homework challenge so any effort is better than none at all. Sometimes you have to give a little.
I hardly ever do the homework challenge so any effort is better than none at all. Sometimes you have to give a little.
Zondrae King
a woman of words
a woman of words
- Zondrae
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Re: Newly Drawn
Here it is - for what it is..
Don't ask me to explain it only that I thought 'how would a visitor from another planet feel if he could not go home." The worst thing would be if he could see his 'star' but never go back.
Newly Drawn
Zondrae King (Corrimal) 8/11
I am homesick for the charcoal that I once held in my hand
as the lines of day drew long on foreign shores.
Oh! the comfort that it brought me as I sat upon the sand
watching birds and list’ning to their mournful ‘caws’.
All my efforts are so fruitless for no matter how I try
they look down upon my paintings with disdain.
Eyes unwilling, look but cannot see the balance with the sky
and the vivid colours flowing cross the plain.
In my homeland light is diff’rent but their eyes will never see
for their minds are closed against the coming dawn.
All their words are not convincing when they say that I am free
while I feel I am a cartoon newly drawn
To this world they broadcast falsehoods. Everything they say rehearsed,
while they hide my ship that travelled oh so far.
Tell me how would they feel if somehow, our circumstance reversed,
and ‘twas they who stood upon a distant star.
Don't ask me to explain it only that I thought 'how would a visitor from another planet feel if he could not go home." The worst thing would be if he could see his 'star' but never go back.
Newly Drawn
Zondrae King (Corrimal) 8/11
I am homesick for the charcoal that I once held in my hand
as the lines of day drew long on foreign shores.
Oh! the comfort that it brought me as I sat upon the sand
watching birds and list’ning to their mournful ‘caws’.
All my efforts are so fruitless for no matter how I try
they look down upon my paintings with disdain.
Eyes unwilling, look but cannot see the balance with the sky
and the vivid colours flowing cross the plain.
In my homeland light is diff’rent but their eyes will never see
for their minds are closed against the coming dawn.
All their words are not convincing when they say that I am free
while I feel I am a cartoon newly drawn
To this world they broadcast falsehoods. Everything they say rehearsed,
while they hide my ship that travelled oh so far.
Tell me how would they feel if somehow, our circumstance reversed,
and ‘twas they who stood upon a distant star.
Zondrae King
a woman of words
a woman of words
- Zondrae
- Moderator
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- Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 9:04 am
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Re: Newly Drawn
Yes,
I agree. That would be appropriate.
I can imagine the 'hollow in the guts' that woud be felt if one could never return to their homeland.
I know when we lived away from Wollongong I longed to come back. I used to say if I had the chance I'd move so fast that I wouldn't even make dust.
The main thing wrong with writing this poem is... now I will have to try to do some more of Maureen's challenges.
I agree. That would be appropriate.
I can imagine the 'hollow in the guts' that woud be felt if one could never return to their homeland.
I know when we lived away from Wollongong I longed to come back. I used to say if I had the chance I'd move so fast that I wouldn't even make dust.
The main thing wrong with writing this poem is... now I will have to try to do some more of Maureen's challenges.
Zondrae King
a woman of words
a woman of words
-
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- Location: Tumut, NSW
Re: Newly Drawn
Good one Zondrae, yes you'll have to keep them coming.
Cheers
Sue
Cheers
Sue
the door is always open, the kettles always on, my shoulders here to cry on, i'll not judge who's right or wrong.