ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

The Dentist

There are fears of the darkness, small spaces and heights, or of rodents, arachnids or snakes,
an aversion to flying or smothering crowds, and obsessions with ailments and aches;
but the thing I most dread, yet must sadly endure for the sake of my sparkling white teeth
is a trip to the dentist to have him investigate what might be lying beneath!
Alas, life dictates that such torment’s essential—to lie there so tense and afraid
while the whine of the drill travels deep through my being and hideous probes then invade.
Though my dentist is kind with the calmest of manner, possessing such beautiful eyes,
I can only imagine the bright pool of blood that is bound to materialise!
So I shut mine and try to block everything out, to pretend that I’m simply not there,
meanwhile counting the seconds before my escape from that ominous, threatening chair.
Though it’s certainly true when you’ve chewed on a Mintie the best advice you can receive
is to book an appointment in calm expectation of help you are sure to achieve,
I resist, then go reeling in terror, all senses alert with a portent of doom;
to my shame I have even been witnessed as weeping before I have entered the room!
But then, oh the bliss when the visit’s behind me, no longer invasion or pain—
when this burden has lifted my first instinct’s always to toast my escape with Champagne!

Love it Catherine! I can certainly relate to the "Mintie" connection ... one of my teeth still lies deep undergound in an opal mine in Lightning Ridge, after we were all given Minties during a mine tour!! I left it (the tooth, not the Mintie) behind as my legacy!!

Now, I've never thought of following up each dentist visit with champagne - but I think it's a great idea - though, after Bob's experience, perhaps it should be "Bundy"!!

Cheers, Shelley

Very innovative use of the prompts and the probes That dental phobia hangs over many heads still it seems, despite all of the modern technology that we have these days.

That brought back some memories...and not all good! Well done.
Trish

Thank you Shelley, Maureen and Trisha. Yes it is all true, except that I learned my lesson long ago to avoid Minties at all costs! I do feel like celebrating after every visit Shelley - my preferred drink is always Champagne, but after the dentist to be honest I'd take anything!

Enjoyed that Catherine. Poor old dentists. No one likes to visit them. Doctors often get little goodies from patients especially at Christmas. I don't think the guy with the high pitched drill bit gets much more than a see you later ... much later if possible.

Wazza

Thanks Wazza, I'm glad you enjoyed it, Yes I must admit I've never gone back with a little gift for a dentist. Poor blokes are the objects of terror and mistrust to me - thanks largely to one who many years ago was so drill happy with many unsuspecting souls (yes, including me!) that in the end he was charged with it and lost his job. I have to admit the one I have here is pretty good though - but I still have to psyche myself up for ages before going