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Homework 7th September

Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2015 2:31 pm
by Catherine Lee
There’s pathos intermingled with my memories of youth,
for innocence was ruined by one secret, ugly truth.
Though images recur of open spaces, love and trust,
the scent of Mum’s delicious shortcake topped with ginger crust,
the quiet of the bush at night with birdsong interspersed,
the freedom and security I felt for years at first...
yet all that changed when Uncle Pat moved in one fateful day,
ostensibly to help us out since Dad had gone away—
for soon he said he wasn’t well, began to stay indoors,
which left poor Mum to cope with added stress and manual chores.
Now shadows fall as I recall that darkened, private room
where like a cunning spider Uncle Pat crouched in the gloom.
Our priceless master hung above his ancient rocking chair;
a cloying scent of dying flowers tropical and rare
exuded from the corner where they lay all bronzed and dead,
becoming like a symbol of my sickened, haunting dread.
He used to get the giggles playing music wild and free—
but then he’d stop abruptly, turn around to stare at me
and beckon in that way I’d learnt to cower from in fear;
I see him now—those vacant eyes, that calculating leer.
He taunted me in darkness for a year before they came
to cart him off to hospital—he never took the blame.
So thoughts of childhood ever since are tainted by my dreams
of rotting blooms, persistent tunes, and silent, anguished screams.

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2015 3:20 pm
by Trisha Patterson
:cry:
Trish

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2015 8:44 pm
by Maureen K Clifford
That's pretty dark Catherine and very, very sad. Strangers aren't the only ones we need to warn our children about. :(

Great use of the prompts in this piece - well done.

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Wed Sep 02, 2015 9:09 pm
by Bob Pacey
Cath I think it would read a lot better in two or four line verses ?


Just my opinion .

Bob

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 4:02 pm
by Catherine Lee
Thank you - appreciate the tip Bob and will play around with it.
I agree Maureen, it's very dark and definitely not my usual type of poem... I don't know where it came from I'm sure!

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Thu Sep 03, 2015 6:31 pm
by Shelley Hansen
Catherine, that is so powerful - dark, but a very pertinent illumination of a subject that is too often kept in the dark.

I actually like it in the one long verse (sorry Bob) because it gives the impression of the writer having a compulsion to unburden a terrible secret all at once - and then perhaps return to silence.
rotting blooms, persistent tunes, and silent, anguished screams.
Sadly, these words conjure up a strong image in my mind - a man my family knew in my youth. He lived alone and was considered a harmless, eccentric "bachelor". I learned much later that he was anything but harmless where boys were concerned. When we visited him, he would insist that I play his piano, offer to turn the pages, and then stand over me breathing heavily. I don't need to tell you how spooked I was! Fortunately for me, girls were not his target.

Reading your words brought the images of his living room so vividly to me - yet I was not harmed by him. How difficult it must be for those whose lives have been ruined by abuse to deal with the myriad reminders day after day for the rest of their lives!

Cheers
Shelley

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Fri Sep 04, 2015 10:22 am
by Catherine Lee
Thank you Shelley, for this thoughtfully written response. Your comment on the bachelor and piano has answered me as to where it must have come from in my subconscious, because I recently read an otherwise delightful coming-of-age novel by Victoria McHalick entitled The Taming, wherein this happened to a boy who lived next door to a concert pianist. Sadly, all this went on - and still goes on - a great deal more than any of us know! x

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Fri Sep 04, 2015 1:32 pm
by Maureen K Clifford
and those triggers remain for the rest of their days - often making life completely intolerable and sinking people into a morass of despair. Life can be so harsh for so many and few of us know what really rows someone else's boat.

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2015 1:28 pm
by mummsie
A very powerful write Catherine :( and great use of the prompts

Sue

Re: Homework 7th September

Posted: Sun Sep 06, 2015 8:33 pm
by warooa
I agree with Sue, kudos to you Cath for going into the darker corners and conjuring something so indelible.

I'll go back to this one.

Cheers, Marty