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Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 7:24 pm
by David Campbell
Had to cheat a bit with the metre in this one...you're making it tough, Maureen!

A Lesson in Life

“All humanity’s corruptible,”
a friend once said to me,
which I guess is understandable,
the way life seems to be.

If you sing for your supper, but in vain,
and chances pass you by,
a reprieve might come in the chance to gain
some riches on the sly.

There are always those who break the rules,
exploiting what they can,
for they see the rest as mugs and fools,
and cheat their fellow-man.

But a dog that bites the hand that feeds
has lessons it must learn,
for in terms of greedy wants and needs,
a wheel can quickly turn.

“Having gusto for life is real wealth,”
my father said to me,
“you can’t counterfeit that, or good health…
integrity’s the key.”

© David 5/10/15

Re: Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2015 7:51 pm
by Neville Briggs
Sounds good to me David. What's this about cheating ?? this isn't a maths exam. it's poetry writing. ;) :)

Re: Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 1:14 pm
by David Campbell
Ah, but metre is mathematics, Neville. Just like music, and if it’s not quite right it’s like playing a dud note. I know Maureen says that the prompts are only rough guidelines but, to me anyway, part of the challenge is trying to use them exactly as presented. And this time it didn’t quite work in terms of consistency. No big deal perhaps, unless somebody asks what a judge is doing posting poetry that doesn't scan properly. Yes, it sort of reads OK, but I can't help hearing those dud notes! :(

Cheers
David

Re: Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 4:02 pm
by Neville Briggs
I think I know what you mean, David. I think of poetic metre more as a sort of numerology than mathematics. ;) :)

Re: Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 5:08 pm
by Shelley Hansen
Great poetic philosophy David! You know, I reckon if you hadn't mentioned it, your departure from the strict rules would have largely gone unnoticed ;) But in the interests of accuracy you have provided a good object lesson to all of us who are striving to get our rhythm and metre correct.

Cheers, Shelley

Re: Homework October 19: A Lesson in Life

Posted: Wed Oct 07, 2015 9:11 pm
by Maureen K Clifford
That's two of you who've said I'm making it tough :lol: There is no deliberation about it I assure you - my brain doesn't work like that. Having said that you managed admirably I see. 8-) I did pick up on the 'dud' note but you being a Poetry judge and me being tone deaf I presumed it was my 'ear' that got it wrong. :shock: And nothing is set in concrete here so if the prompts need to be altered a tad in the interests of good poetry that's fine by me. ;)