ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

In The Poo

His Jackie Howe was torn
blood flowed from his chin.
The whole pub went so silent
as he slowly staggered in.

His mouth looked to be broken
for it was bending to the left.
His eyes were swollen tightly shut
of sight they were bereft.

He was covered in what looked like mud
all through his hair and beard..
His moleskins wrapped around his knees
it really looked quite weird.

He had a tattered punctured tyre
clasped in his vice like grip.
He stepped across the blue dog
but that caused him to slip.

He fell onto the corner table
as we could only stop and stare.
Cracked cups clattered to the floor
food scattered everywhere.

He rose up really carefully
a terrible state we thought.
No one was game to move
as he let out a roaring snort.

Bill mustered up the courage
and asked "how ya going mate"
We wondered how he found himself
in such a drastic state.

"I was caught short in the car" he said
my situation was so dire.
But as I hurried up the hill
I tripped on this bloody tyre.

I hit my head upon the doorway
on a piece of corrugated tin.
Then as I settled on the pan
a big brown snake crawled in.

I jumped up then in panic
cause the pan was set so low.
I pushed a panel off the back.
the only way that I could go.

Then as I bolted out the back
and it really made a din
I tried to pull my strides up
but I kicked the bloody tin.

The pan was almost brimming
and it splattered everywhere.
I've got stuff clinging to my boots
and more stuck in my hair.

I rolled a fair way down the hill
propelled by utter fear.
And you ask "how I'm going "
Mate I need a bloody beer.

Bob Pacey (c)

He'd need more than a beer - a can of air freshener wouldn't go astray either. Very innovative use of the prompts in this one Bob - VERY INNOVATIVE

Ergh - picture this! Very original Bob, and conjures up the image really well - I like the last line; he'd be in need of several I should imagine!

Definitely some "toilet humour" there Bob ... literally!!!

Good one
Shelley