Homework WE 6/6/16 - The Bloke's Dilemma

[Shelley Hansen]

Just couldn't resist following David's lead and using this week's prompts in a "writing poetry" theme. With due deference to CJ Dennis (especially my quoted final phrase) ... Bill the Sentimental Bloke is at it again!

The Bloke's Dilemma
(c) Shelley Hansen 26/5/16
(With Due Deference to CJ Dennis)

I thort I orta rite a bit o’ blimmin’ poitry -
I can’t allow these other blokes ter make the leap on me!
There’s poits all across the globe wot rites such bonzer stuff;
if I gits readin’ theirs, then it is shure ter be enuff
ter teach me ’ow ter go about an’ make me words sprout wings
so soon my sorta poitry would be foke’s fav’rite things.

There’s sonnets by a bloke named Will – same moniker as me -
but I got muddled up wiv ’im … ’is thy an’ thou an’ thee.
Then Banjo’s Man frum Snowy River popped inter me ’ead -
but why, I arst meself, are Flintstones flyin’ – Wilma? Fred?
An’ wot about these free verse coves wiv navel-gazing skills?
Oh ’oly wars! Them metaphors near sent me ter the 'ills!

I s’pose I should get uster it, the diff’rent poitry
that spills itself frum other pens, but fairly puzzles me!
I ain’t the sort ter tork about fine dinin’, sailin’ ships,
or likenin’ some pomegranate seed ter Doreen’s lips!
I only know that my Doreen … well, she’s the tart fer me -
the ripest, sweetest little peach wot ever graced a tree!
An’ nothin’ else is needed but a man, ’is lovin’ wife,
an’ doin’ as yer wud be done by … throo the mooch o’ life!

[David Campbell]

Yep, you can't beat ol' Den, and as usual, you've done him proud....love the 'oly wars and metaphors!

Cheers
David

[Maureen K Clifford]

I arst meself, are Flintstones flyin’ – Wilma? Fred?

ROTFLMHO ...You are wicked Shelley. What a clever write - I love it Well done

[Shelley Hansen]

Thanks David and Maureen - though I really don't know what ROTFLMHO means, Maureen! Obviously I'm showing my ignorance of abbreviations - and probably my age!

The "soil" of dear old Den is certainly a fertile ground for inspiration, David - for me, anyway! He hits the spot in so many ways.

As a side point (you probably realise this David), my reference to "sailin' ships" wasn't a shot at Wendy's excellent homework piece, but rather, an oblique reference to Sea Fever, the famous verse penned by John Masefield who visited Den at The Singing Gardens, Toolangi, in 1934 - leading to the commemorative planting of the celebrated copper beech tree which still stands today.

For those interested, Den wrote a tribute to Masefield who was in Australia for Victoria's Centenary celebrations. It was one of his Herald pieces and you can read it here: http://www.middlemiss.org/lit/authors/d ... field.html

Cheers
Shelley

[Shelley Hansen]

Just realised I probably made a faux-pas with "pomegranate". Bill would no doubt have spelt it "pommygrannit" !!

[Maureen K Clifford]

ROTFLMHO -folling on the floor laughing my head off Just read it again and I am still giggling