We Headed For The Beach Today

[Stephen Whiteside]

This poem was published in "Celebrate! The End of Year Reciter" by Triple D Books in 2007.


We Headed For The Beach Today

© Stephen Whiteside 19.12.04

We headed for the beach today. It all went very well.
No-one had a crumby time, as far as we could tell.
No-one grazed their knee, or stubbed their toe, or bumped their head.
We didn’t see a wombat by the road-side, lying dead.
We did not see a dolphin that had stranded by the shore.
No-one drowned. We did not see a tell-tale patch of gore
Where a swimmer had been monstered by a white or tiger shark.
We did not find it hard to spot a shady place to park.
No-one caught a fish hook in their finger or their eye.
Nobody got sunburnt. A toddler didn’t cry.
We didn’t see a cargo ship get holed upon the rocks.
Nobody came home with too much sand inside their socks.
There were no howling protests about sunburn cream in eyes.
We weren’t attacked by mozzies, and we weren’t beset by flies.
No-one told their child to stop behaving like a wuss.
Nobody was poisoned by a blue-ringed octopus.
No-one burnt their feet upon a long, hot stretch of sand.
No-one drove a jet ski into waters that were banned.
The tide did not come in and soak our clothing and our towels.
We did not leave behind some plastic buckets or some trowels.
No-one boasted of a beach they knew that was much better.
Nobody was sprayed on by a soaking wet red setter.
No-one dropped their sandwiches. No-one spilled their drink.
The rocks were not too pointy, and the sea-weed didn’t stink.
At end of day we did not find we could not fold our dome.
No-one sat on someone’s favourite shell while driving home.
The fish and chip shop didn’t have a queue a mile long,
And no-one stepped upon the end of someone else’s thong.
We didn’t see a helpless child get swept out by the rip.
No-one popped a button, tore a sleeve, or jammed a zip.
No-one stepped upon a stone-fish hidden in the sand.
No-one swam outside the flags in waters that weren’t manned.
No-one saw their ice-cream melt and fall upon the dirt.
No-one lost their temper, or was moody, rude or curt.
No-one grizzled. No-one snarled. No-one yelled or jeered.
We didn’t see a baby grab his daddy by the beard.
A change did not arrive to make the water dark and wild.
A shiny flying saucer did not steal a little child.
We headed for the beach today. It all just seemed to gel
And, as I think I said before, it really went quite well.

[Neville Briggs]

What a boring day at the beach

[Maureen K Clifford]

Love it - your imagination was working overtime with this one Stephen - then again maybe not as it all sounds perfectly normal really.

Cheers

Maureen

[Stephen Whiteside]

Memories, Maureen, memories... Thanks.