ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

Sitting In The Surgery

I'd been feeling really ill mate
Ya know things ain't really looking good.
I haven't seen a doc for years
though the misses says I should.

So I made a late appointment
I picked a name out of the book.
ah gees I hate the smell of medicine
but mate I've never felt so crook.

Up to the counter then I fronts
the receptionist to meet;
but the doctors running late she says
so I'd better take a seat.

So I grabbed a readers digest
about ten years old, I checked the date.
I found a seat around the corner
and I settled in to wait.

Then the guy beside me has a coughing fit
like his next breath would be his last.
I tried to turn away real quick
but I still copped a germ filled blast.

So I moved over the other side
and found a seat against the wall.
I'd only just got settled
when I gets an urgent call.

Well I tried to hold on to it
just in case my name came out.
The lady moved from next to me
as I writhed and squirmed about.

Then I spied the toilet arrow sign
and made a bee line for the door.
I settled in the cubicle
oh dear my guts are bloody sore.


Then just as I got comfy
I hear my name over the air.
I really had not finished
but still I bolted out of there.

When I got up to the counter
I found someone else had got my spot.
I sat back down to wait again
gees this place is bloody hot.

"Oh no" the pains come back again
so to the cubicle I fly.
I heard them call my name once more
oh its enough to make you cry.

When things had got more settled
I once more resumed my chair.
I was the only one left waiting
stagnant silence filled the air.

The doctor had an urgent case
and might be a little while.
The lady on the counter
gave me a wary smile.

At last he's back so in I trot
he must have thought I'd lost me brain.
I'd been so obsessed with waiting
I forgot about the pain.

And I'm really feeling better now
since my visit to the loo.
Well I thought it was a heart attack
so what's a man to do.

Five minutes mate it took him
I still don't know just what he did.
But when I got up to the counter
they still charged me fifty quid.

So now I've learned me lesson
when I get a pain I know just what to do.
I won't make a dammed appointment
till I've visited the loo.

Bob Pacey ( c )

G/day Bob,
Following on from my advice on your last post mate, I've been told you can pick up lots of nasties of a toilet seat, and who knows what the last bloke to use that seat before you had, hope you've been well inoculated. Nothings dropped off I hope?
Good one Bob.

Terry

Hate going into doctors surgerys at the best of times. I was waiting and when I finally got near to my turn all these Brazilian meatworkers came in for their shots.

Do not have much luck woth doctors was waiting at yeppoon hospital for a script and was next in line and a fella runs in with his hand wrapped in a towel screaming " I just cut two fingers off with a drop saw " and the bugger jumped the que how inconciderate.

Did you give him the finger?