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MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 9:49 am
by Neville Briggs
MY COMPETITION ENTRY

I've tried to please the judges with my rhyme,
and make a careful strict consistent metre.
It's hard to match the words for every time
that judges will be pleased to see a rhyme.
And they consider it a dreadful crime,
inserting substitutions in the metre.
I'll try to please the judges with my rhyme,
and make a careful strict consistent metre.

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 10:55 am
by Maureen K Clifford
Think your needles stuck in the groove which ain't groovy :lol: :lol:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 1:43 pm
by Heather
Well, Neville, I thought your rhyme was good except for the word metre. I'd try to find another word. Time, slime, mime, sublime, whine should work. Keep up the good work though, you'll get there eventually.

Heather :lol:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 5:01 pm
by Neville Briggs
Now I'll have to go in the dunce's corner :cry:
We all have to write some junk sometimes Marty, that's part of the learning process I think.


Maureen, It's just a little exercise in writing a triolet, which is a sort of round and that form requires repeated phrases.
It's not a story , just a bit of a play on words because the verse is in strict metre and rhyme. ;) trust me Heather :)

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 5:48 pm
by Bob Pacey
Whats that Neville a toilet ????

it is round on the top I know.

lost me

Bob

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 6:29 pm
by Neville Briggs
Tough audience to-night. :shock:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Tue May 03, 2011 9:27 pm
by Maureen K Clifford
No not tough Neville just challenged...now that you mention it I do remember that poetry form - didn't we have a go at it some time back? :oops: :oops: hence I am now mortally embarrassed because I didn't recognize it as such. I will go sit in the naughty corner and hang my head in shame :oops: :cry:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 9:13 am
by Heather
Neville, I don't think I could trust anyone that hides behind a book...,mmmmm

Maureen, don't go there (the naughty corner) - you just never know who might be there...

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 9:17 am
by Bob Pacey
Come on in my little cherub.

I've made this pad my own.

Tv, Video, Computor, Fridge and of course pictures on the wall.

Got lots of tools and stuf.

Hang on this is not a naughty corner it's a bloody shed.

Yoe beauty

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Posted: Wed May 04, 2011 9:26 am
by Maureen K Clifford
Now Bob was that invitation for me??? or for young Heather???? because she is the little cherub I am merely the wistful old woman according to he who shall be nameless because both his names are the same :lol:

If you meant me (be still my heart) I have always liked sheds and Bunnings is by far my most favourite :lol: store. (Batting eyelashes)