ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

Old Bill

Oh, your mane may be in tatters
And your coat a shaggy grey.
You can see a hint of stagger in your gait.
Yes, we've seen the years fly by Bill
Throughout the good times and the bad
But you're more than just a stock horse, you're my mate.

All those years of droving stock Bill.
Oh how the time has flown.
I'd swear you were a colt just yesterday.
I remember when I picked you
From that wild-eyed brumby mob
By gees you were a good'en in your day.

Wheeling cattle round the stock camp
While the rain came tumbling down
Chasing wild back country scrubbers with old Jack.
There was not a horse could beat you
When a mob had took to flight
I remember how we brought that baldy back.

At cutting steers around the yards Bill
There was ne'er better horse than you.
You were not the one to root or buck or stamp.
Holding cleanskins down for branding,
sorting pikers from the mob
Or riding night watch around a dark and rainy camp.

And when I broke my leg at " Shanghai "
Trying to catch that brumby roan
A pitch black night without a moon or lamp.
I never would have made it
without you at my side.
You carried me for miles back to our camp.

Now the years have taken toll Bill.
The long paddock beckons still
But you've done your watch and now's your time to rest.
Let your final years pass slowly
Where the sweetest grasses grow.
In my memory Bill you'll always be the best.

So graze down by the river,
rest quietly in the shade.
Wander slowly on the flats down by the bend.
Our droving days are over
But I'll always be there with you Bill.
You're more than just a stockhorse
You're my friend.

Bob Pacey ( C )

Many thanks Bob brings an old stockmans eyes all shiney reading that, as it brings back many memories

BILL THE OLD BATTLER

Beautifully written Bob. A lot of sentiment in this one, I really enjoyed it.

Sue

Heartfelt Bob. Well done on your fame!

Thank you very much Bill. Sue and Heather.

I performed this tonight and it had the desired effect, silence and tears.


Cheers Bob pacey I. A. W. P. Esquire.

Hope you supply the tissues for your audiences Bob a fitting end for a good Mate.

Enjoyed that Bob. You painted the picture well.

Thanks.

Thanks Bob.

nuff said.

Jim.

Thanks Darren and Jim still not great but getting there.

Cheers Bob

Just a couple of questions about the layout, Bill. There are a couple of inconsistencies. My guess is they are not intentional, and I feel the drag they poem down a bit. I don't think you'd notice them in a performance, but you do on the printed page.

The general pattern of the poem is six line verses, with the rhyme on lines 3 and 6. However, you break this on two occasions.

The fifth verse only has five lines, with the rhyme on lines 3 and 5. If 'without you at my side' became a new line all on its own you would automatically solve the problem, by being in line with the previously established pattern.

The final verse has six lines, but the rhyme is on lines 2 and 6. Again, this can be fairly easily fixed. 'Rest quietly in the shade' should be a new line. This would create a seven line verse, but if 'you're my friend' is attached to the previous line, you will be back to six line verses, with the rhyme on lines 3 and 6.

I can understand the desire to place 'you're my friend' on a final line all on its own, but there's no way you can do this without interrupting the pattern of the poem. Another way to do it would be like this:

'You're more than just a stockhorse...you're my friend.' (The three dots are called an elipsis.)

This probably sounds very picky, and I suppose it is, but I think you have to be pretty picky sometimes to write good bush verse. For better or worse, it's a fairly picky genre.