ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

A little piece of doggerel concerning a recent European dining experience

WILL SANTA COME THIS CHRISTMAS


If Santa does not come this year I think I’ll know the reason,
unwittingly, a deed of mine may spoil the Christmas season.
So, here and now, right up front, a confession I must make
In Norway, very recently, I dined on reindeer steak.

The meat was very tasty, all red and cooked so rare
but, how can I be sure it was not Rudolph lying there?
Will there not be anyone to pull old Santa’s sleigh,
how will he deliver cheer if no one lights the way.

I’m starting to feel guilty, like I’ve killed the golden goose,
now I wish that night I’d eaten not reindeer but moose
or prawn or crab or scallops, the menu had all these,
salmon, cod and halibut and pollock if you please.

Not much I can do though now, I’ll just hope for the best
and trust somehow Santa will complete his Christmas quest.
After all, the meal that brought contentment to my belly
was maybe not poor Rudolph but, perhaps a distant relly.


Jeff Thorpe 13 October 2011 ©

G'day Jeff,

You have handled your topic very well. We poets often think of things in a different way that other people. It is so reassuring to know that I am not the only slightly 'bent' person in the world. And as for Santa.. He is magic you know so I'm sure he could find another 'Rudolph' if need be. Thanks for sharing this charming piece.

Hello Zondrae

Thank you for your response. I did hesitate to post this poem, wondering how it would be received. Nice to know someone of your experience thought it had some merit.

Regards, Jeff

You don't want to hold back here Jeff - we are all broad minded, good humoured people most of the time and this was funny although I feel obligated to take you to task over eating reindeer they are a threatened species. Moose would have been better.

Zondrae that is like saying that we could replace Phar Lap No no no no no!!!!!! Santa would no doubt find one similar to but different from Rudolph...Ranaldo perhaps because then you wouldn't have to change the song to much.

Cheers

Maureen

To Whom It May Concern"

On behalf of the other reindeer. I PROTEST! Rudolph was not in the original band. We just needed him for recording purposes. like a session Muso. So how come he gets all the cudos?

Randolph (the BROWN nosed reindeer)
was feeling rather sickly.
He could run as fast as Rudolph -
but couldn't STOP as quickly.

Oh no Jeff, Maureen please don't sink your teeth into my mate Bullwinkle.

Personally Neville you know I would never do that - IMO chocolate is the safest eating option. Nothing has to die to make it

Very funny Jeff. Let's keep our fingers crossed it wasn't Rudolph else you are in all sorts of trouble!

All us vegetarians would be at a loss.


Wonder if it tastes like roo meat ?


Cheers Bob