ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

An Almond in my Undies

Stephen Whiteside 10.12.2012

Today I found an almond in my undies.
Perhaps last night I had too many Bundies,
And in my head some wiring jumped its sprocket.
I don't like almonds hid in my Reg Grundies.
It makes no sense to see a nut and jock it.
I'd much prefer a peanut in my pocket.

Not sure whether salted, blanched or roasted.
It's not the sort of thing that's ever boasted.
Never see such moments on the tele.
Never see the likes on Facebook posted.
I reckon that it might be slightly smelly.
It should be on a plate, or in my belly.

Only glad it wasn't chocky coated
(A state that I am sure I would have noted).
Saturday's the best of all the fundies.
I was shickered, quite completely creosoted;
Perhaps I should try cutting back the Bundies.
I don't want no more almonds in my undies!

What sort of company are you keeping Stephen? An almond in your unmentionables is not something one should publicize nor mention in polite company. What next, a tin of baked beans in your watchamacallits? A tennis racquet up your jumper? I would be very careful about flying if I were you otherwise you may find yourself bailed up at the airport x-ray machine!

Yes, I suppose if Customs was manned by squirrels I could be in trouble. Fortunately, you can't get squirrels through Customs in Australia.

Marty...yes, quite.

Coulda been worse....coulda been a nugget.

What? Oh.

Mmm...

Oh nuts thats bad luck Steve


Bob

Bad luck or bad management?