ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

OUTWARD BOUND

or Heave ho me hearties.

I could go down to the sea;
go down to the sea in a ship.
I'd like to enjoy some cruising
if only I didn't get sick.

My face gets a ghastly blanch,
my last meal is spouted forth,
and this effect happens aboard
the boat while it's still at the wharf.

I've taken a patent pill
to quell my vertiginous spell,
but when the horizon gyrates
the pill is expelled to the swell.

Foray on the ocean wave,
a jaunt on the heaving sea;
while you might enjoy all things nautical,
feel free to go without me.

Oh Neville you've brought back memories of a fishing trip gone wrong. We were in the calmest, clearest most beautiful waters protected by the outer islands of Fiji - tropical paradise. I'd had a perfect day kyacking and snorkling and sipping cocktails in a hammock. Then a fishing trip was suggested before dinner and I was up for it - what could go wrong - it was calm and perfect. About eight of us loaded into the tinny, with no life jackets (although I think I may have snatched one from somewhere), and our fishing lines were hand lines with nuts for weights - so Fijian. My alarm grew as we headed out to open sea beyond the protection of the islands with the swell seeming to come from all directions. Quickly, very, very embarrassingly quickly I became incredibly sea sick. It was the longest, most tortuous hour or two of my life and I felt ill and swayed for hours afterwards. Photos taken that night show me looking positively grey.

Your rhyme is crap and your metre sucks!! ...

Oh Manfred, you should cleanse your soul by having a viewing of Dead Poet's Society , as Robin Williams says in that film " we are doing poetry not laying pipe "

The rhymes are suitably placed with the legitimate use of perfect plus slant, near rhyme or assonance.
The metre is the very traditional accentual trimeter, nothing odd about that.




Heather, I know what you mean, been there, suffered that. The line about still at the wharf is TRUE

Had a mate once Nev who would always shower, never have a bath as he reckoned it got too choppy in there!!!

Ron

There fixed it for ya nev old son.


I could go down to the sea;
yeah that's what I'd like to do.
I'd like to enjoy some cruising
if I could be sure I wouldn't spew !.

It's Manfred that needs fixing Bob.

Fixing or fixing up ! Nev


Bob

Is fixing the same as pickling?

I think Manfred can handle the pickling himself Heather.

Fixing, fixed up, straightened out, sorted out, corrected, repaired; all those Bob.