Skiing In My Undies

[Stephen Whiteside]

Skiing In My Undies

© Stephen Whiteside 12.06.11

I’m skiing at Mt Stirling, and the sun is in the sky -
Cross country skis, not downhill, so there are no passers by.
There ain’t no better way to spend your Sat’dies or your Sundies.
Look at me!
I’m wild and free!
I’m skiing in my undies!

You don’t have much control when you are on these narrow skis.
The slope’s a major challenge when it’s just fifteen degrees.
I topple and I tumble, but it’s still the best of fundies!
You leave a lot
Of skid marks when
You’re skiing in your undies!

I laugh. I cry. I scream. I shout. I holler and I curse.
Denounce the world in general in vocabulary terse.
You’d very likely think that I had drunk too many bundies.
I’m clean as glass.
Hey, kiss me arse!
I’m skiing in my undies!

[Heather]

Stephen what ARE YOU ON?

[Stephen Whiteside]

Almost a true story, Heather. I went to Stirling with my son and a friend of his late last year. It was a beautiful spring day, we had the mountain to ourselves, and we stripped to the waist. We were just starting to take our daks off when a young family turned up, and we decided it might be best not to!

I went back to Stirling again with my son today. The mountain was no busier (we saw four people all day!) but it was windy and cool, and the snow wasn't that great, so we weren't tempted. The visibility was fabulous, though, so we had a great day - and I came home with a poem in my pocket. What else can you ask for?

Actually, writing it down wasn't that easy. There are two huts up there, but for some reason neither of them had log books today, so I couldn't write it down. Eventually got back to the car and got the pen out of the glove-box, but I'd only written a couple of lines when it ran out of ink! (This poem doesn't want to be written!) Finally managed to borrow a pen at the servo at the bottom of the mountain. Aren't you glad?

[Heather]

You didn't think to write it in the snow Stephen?

It's been really cold here today so I imagine it must have been freezing in the hills. Haven't they had much snow yet? I thought it would have been a good start to the snow season. Haven't seen the weather all week (I know it's cold) so don't know if there has been snow.

Heather

[Stephen Whiteside]

Yeah, I did have a thought like that. Can't remember what it was now. The dust in one of the huts, or something.

They had a good dump last week - Tuesday and Wednesday I think it was. One of the best opening weekends in many years. I was determined to grab it while I could. There was snow all the way down to TBJ, so the tracks were good, but the summit was rather disappointing. My son did a fabulous somersault at one point, though!

I know it's not the Outback, but boy it feels like Australia up there. Gum trees everywhere, of course. The view from the top is just incredible - Mount Buller, the Bluff, the Viking, the Razor, Mount Cobbler, etc. I don't even know most of them. And the silence is incredible. Such a feeling of timelessness. You just sink into it. And all dusted with snow, of course.

[Heather]

Haven't been up there in the snow Stephen but from the time I was 10 to about 16, we did a lot of four wheel drive trips up in the high country. Beautiful and so clear.

A couple of years ago we spent some time at Hotham at Easter (no snow) because friends had a flat up there. Kids were little at the time. Once we'd done Dinner Plain and a few other day trips it became pretty boring so we decided to leave and go to Omeo and Bairnsdale where we had friends. From there we went to Glenmaggie where I wanted to check out some ancestor's land and we decided to drive back over the mountains again from Licola to Jamieson. Well you probably know that on a map it isnt "that" far but doing only 60km an hour it took I think 3 hours. But --- it was stunningly beautiful and the silence was out of this world. I remember thinking how isolated it was and nothing to see forever but mountains in every direction. Something I'll never forget.

Heather

[Bob Pacey]

Australia is Australia Stephen that's why we all love it so. used to do a lot of camping when the kids were young but my ex really only tolerated it until they left home.

oh a dump has a completly different meaning up here in ossified Queensland and seeing as your were in your undies it would fit.


Bob

[Stephen Whiteside]

A dump. Yes, quite.

[Neville Briggs]

Stephen....I think that is just the right style and pace for a bit of a fun verse.

I must admit that snow " sports " have no appeal to me at all.

[Stephen Whiteside]

Thanks, Neville.

Remember, you're never too old to try something now. You probably just haven't been introduced to the snow in the right way. If you're not properly prepared, it can be a pretty traumatic experience!