Free verse

[Heather]

Good one Marty.

[william williams]

IN ANSWER MARTY


Patience © Bill Williams

Is she sitting by the doorway?
Just to catch the evening breeze
Or maybe she is waiting
For some one, who’s coming home?

So she sits a little longer
As the night comes slowly down
Or maybe she is lonely
For some one, who’s coming home?

So she sits a little longer
While darkness is creeping on
But she’s still sitting there
Waiting for some one, to come home

She rises, lights the lantern
Stoke the fire in the stove
Then sits by the doorway
Waiting for some one, to come home

[Dave Smith]

Free Verse? I think it rhymes! Or do you mean it cost nothing?

TTFN

[Maureen K Clifford]

Very slow morning Love that word conniptions


Oh Marty you just haven’t tried hard enough. Don’t you know
that conniptions has two nns in it? I thought I’d share that. So
don’t get wicked mad like a guy who stubbed his toe.
Free verse becomes addictive – it’s just the rhyme you forego.

[Maureen K Clifford]

Bill she needs to get a life - Might consider taking up poetry

Had I the patience for that kind of waiting Bill I would probably put it like this.


Does she still sit waiting by the doorway?

Is it the cool breeze that attracts her
or the longing for that first sight of him
coming down the road
that will bring him to her door?


Is she lonely? The nights are long
and darkness comes slowly.

She waits a little longer then rises,
stokes the fire and lights the lamp
that will guide her love home,

Then sits by the door again – waiting.

[william williams]

She had a very busy life raised three kids on her own and those kids my cousins never wanted till the day she died, milked 45 goats each day and sold the milk to people whose children had excma had a wonderfull vegi garden which she sold the excess raised pigs cows and chooks and sold the eggs.

I wrote that about my aunty Muriel as a tribute to her. until the day she died always sat at the doorway waiting encase any one came. She did this for donkey’s years after uncle Frank got killed in Korea

bill the old battler

[DollyDot]

Bill

If that is free verse it is lovely! It may not rhyme but it has a lilt to it and glides off the tongue.
I love the story behind it as well. Sounds like she was a a great lady and a fitting tribute to her.

Dot

[william williams]

Thanks Marty B I know the stuff you are taking about A freind of mine Dennis Thomas who writes the sort of stuff you dislike funny thing about it he has published three books so far and is making quite a few quid with them and is now working on his fourth mind you in America where they are selling well and you know what they say about the yanks *#*#*! they would by anything. Still thanks for all of you people for you remarks

bill the old battler

[Neville Briggs]

Just a couple of comments Marty that spring to mind.

1. There's bad " free verse " out there , there's also bad ' bush poetry " out there claiming to be working in some sort of well established tradition. The problem is not in the forms, it is in the writers who don't understand what they are doing or do not make the effort to work at it enough.

2. " there is nought I need arrange "
" just put my words together doesn't matter how they go "
" just forget what I have learned "

These statements are totally false.

If that's what you think free verse is, then you certainly will never be able to " do it " and I'm afraid these statements give the impression that you seem to have a lot to learn about understanding any sort of poetry.

3. The crucial element of poetry IS METRE, not rhyme. Even so-called free verse, which isn't free anyway, needs to demonstrate some application of a metric form, even if it is a loose or syncopated structure. And anyway, there is free verse around on the contemporary scene that uses rhyme.


4. The issue of obscurantism is a valid point, but a separate one from the issue of form.

Some contemporary verse writers think that poetry must be couched in some sort of Zen hallucinations. I agree there is some ridiculous rubbish pretending to be profound which is nothing more than irrational drivel. But that is due to the application of post-modernist unreason, not to the application of informal verse structure.
By the way, the contemporary poets will come back and say that there is around, here and there, ridiculous rubbish presented as traditional rhyme and metre, which is nothing more that dreary anecdotes arranged as doggerel. Are they right ???

Try to be like the well trained soldier, mate, identify the target before you open fire.

[Neville Briggs]

Slow Friday?... everyday is slow for me at the moment.