WikiBards

[Stephen Whiteside]

For those of you who are not members of the Henry Lawson Memorial & Literary Society Inc., this poem was published in their most recent newsletter.


WikiBards

© Stephen Whiteside 14.12.2010

LAWSON (excited)
This Julian Assange, by Jove, he’s making quite a name!
I don’t know how he does it, but I really like his game.
He’s bringing all the rich to heel. He’s striking quite a blow
For the battlers, for the honest poor, the Drover's Wife, you know.
I see a brighter future. I see a grander day.
WikiLeaks is set to show the world a better way!

PATERSON (irritated)
Oh, come on Henry. Bless my heart! How can you really think
That WikiLeaks will change the world? You must be on the drink!
All of us tell little lies. Come on, now, don’t you snigger!
Little folk tell little lies, and bigger folk tell bigger.
The PMs tell the biggest lies. That MUST be their direction.
If they told the truth, then they would lose the next election!
WikiLeaks will change the world? Well, only to the letter.
They all will keep on lying, but they’ll learn to hide them better!
I guess poor Clancy overflowed with leaks from ev'ry bar,
But you can't tell many secrets with a thumbnail dipped in tar!

LAWSON (thoughtfully)
Well, what do you think, Dennis? Do I speak the truth, or he?
The world will change, or stay the same? Which is it to be?

DENNIS (leaning back, puffing on his pipe)
I am quite undecided, boys. Both sides I clearly see.
To both of you I sometimes nod, and sometimes disagree.
The Sentimental Bloke, no doubt, would reckon lyin' grim,
But Bill the berry farmer is not me, and I'm not him.
Besides, I’m sure you understand, I only rhyme for pay.
You can read my own opinion in ‘The Herald’ every day!

LAWSON (offended)

I say, ol’ Den, that’s pretty cheap. Why, here there’s just us mates,
Yet still the metre’s running, and you’re talking of your rates!

PATERSON (impatiently)
Oh, stow it, Lawson. Leave him be. His virtues are quite ample.
Why, you’d do very well, I think, to follow his example.
You only ever find the cash to buy another glass.
He seems too ruled by money? I’d suggest you let it pass.

DENNIS (astonished)
You two are just amazing. Why, take anything at all -
A drop of rain, a ray of sun, a beetle on the wall -
You’ll find a way to argue. Mr Left and Mr Right.
You’ll start it at the sun-up, and you’ll keep up till the night.
I suspect you’re just one person, and the arguments we see
Reflect the different aspects of one personality.
Mr Ying and Mr Yang, that’s what you blokes are.
You shine so bright you don’t leave room for any other star!

LAWSON (surprised)

Hey, come on, Den. You’ve done all right. You needn’t be like that.
Compared to how your books have sold, mine all look rather flat.

DENNIS (starting to sound a bit bitter)
It isn’t just the numbers sold. Yes, mark my words, you’ll see.
You’ll make more impression in this nation’s history!

PATERSON (angrily)

Oh, shove it, both of you, I beg. You sound like little kids,
Striving, both, to see, for fame, who’s made the greatest bids!

DENNIS (seething with rage!)
I hate you, Henry! What’s your trick? You smash up ev’ry rule.
You drink too much. You go to gaol, behaving like a fool.
I save all my pennies, and I labour at my craft,
But it’s YOU the public worship. Oh, I think they’re just plain daft!

LAWSON (deeply offended)

Why Dennis, I had no idea you really felt that way,
But now that you’ve revealed yourself, I do not think I’ll stay.
I really thought you were my friend. I know now that’s not true,
And so, if it is all the same, I’ll take my leave of you!

PATERSON (somewhat philosophically)

The truth will save the world, eh, Lawson? That is what you said?
The honest poor will knock the wealthy liars on the head?
You see a brighter future? You see a grander day?
WikiLeaks is set to show the world a better way?

LAWSON (wearily)

You’re right, dear Banjo, yes you’re right. I see how wrong I’ve been.
I’m old and worn and grizzled, but at times, I’m really green.
It’s lies that make the world go round. Of truth, we take a dose,
But, in truth, it’s very scary if we view it up too close!

DENNIS (grovelling)
Lawson, I’m so sorry. Don’t know what got into me.
The truth is, I admire you. I do, enormously.
I might have the brains and wit, but you’ve got all the heart,
And if I tried to copy you, I’d not know where to start!

LAWSON (starting to feel a bit better)

Why, thank you Dennis, very much. I do appreciate
Your kindly words and I, in turn, think you are also great.
I see it’s cold and wet outside. I think perhaps I’ll stay.
I’d still like your opinion, and I am prepared to pay!

PATERSON (turning to audience)

And so the world keeps turning, for the rich and for the poor,
And Good and Evil, turn in turn, come knocking at their door,
And little babies, born today, will all, in time grow old,
And WikiLeaks will come and go, and lies will still be told!

[william williams]

very well done Stephen

Bill tho old Battler

[manfredvijars]

... Stephen, thinking and talking for THREE Classissists(contemporarilly) - Man, your prognistications are far too copius for a bloke of my diminuitive intellect ...

[Dave Smith]

" ! "

[Bob Pacey]

Bloody brilliant Stephen. How the flamin hell did you come up with that idea.
I do not know what Manfred said either Marty but it looks good in print !!

Now away I go to look up my theaurises bugger can't even spell that .


Help Bob

[r.magnay]

..G'day Doc, been awhile since we heard from you but well worth the wait! A very clever and well constructed piece of writing...loved it mate.

[Stephen Whiteside]

Thanks, Bob. How did I come up with the idea?

Last year I won the Humorous Section of the Grenfell Henry Lawson comp with a poem that finished with the possibility of Susan Boyle singing a Henry Lawson song. Noel Tennison, the new editor of the newsletter of the Henry Lawson Society, liked the poem, asked me to write another poem along similar lines for them, with Lawson talking with one or more of his colleagues about a contemporary issue of some sort. I wrote this the next day.

[Bellobazza]

Stephen...I dips me lid!

[Heather]

Brilliant Stephen! Loved it.

Heather

[Zondrae]

G'day Stephen,

I wrote a reply to this earlier but it has gone. (?) a lot of this happening lately and not only to my posts. So I will give the short version.

This is a very well thought out and presented work.
When do you have time for Doctoring?
I have had a look over the programme for the National. Woohoo the yarnspinng is NOT banished to the wilderness of the Stock Camp. If you have had influence over this, I thank you. It will make my task so much easier.