homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

All Registered Forum Users can participate in the writing exercises for the current fortnight.
Users can also participate in comment and constructive feedback in this Workshop.

Moderator: Shelley Hansen

Post Reply
User avatar
Wendy Seddon
Posts: 446
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 5:20 pm
Location: Medowie NSW

homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by Wendy Seddon » Thu May 26, 2016 2:09 pm

The Cruise

My friend has hit the big six-o
and thought it would be cool
to take a cruise across the globe
and ask her friends from school.

Now cruising’s not my favourite thing,
can think of nothing worse!
But, she’s a mate – I’ll make the leap
and stifle every curse.

She said there’s entertainment
and fine dining that’s the best,
But how can I go dancing when
I’m stuffed in safety vest?

Ships are on the water where
they rock and roll and pitch!
“Wen, you will get used to it.”
she said, she’s such a mate.

I argue it’s not needed
we can celebrate ashore!
But still she sent my ticket
and would hear of nothing more.
Wen de Rhymewriter There is nothing mundane about the ordinary.

User avatar
David Campbell
Posts: 1232
Joined: Sun Nov 28, 2010 10:27 am
Location: Melbourne
Contact:

Re: homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by David Campbell » Thu May 26, 2016 2:38 pm

Hi Wendy

Someone we know went on a cruise and described it as "taking a holiday in a shopping mall". (I like your 'rhyme' for "pitch"!)

Cheers
David

User avatar
Wendy Seddon
Posts: 446
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 5:20 pm
Location: Medowie NSW

Re: homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by Wendy Seddon » Thu May 26, 2016 3:17 pm

Well David, a holiday in a shopping mall sounds good to me - maybe I will enjoy it after all!
Wen de Rhymewriter There is nothing mundane about the ordinary.

Neville Briggs
Posts: 6946
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

Re: homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by Neville Briggs » Thu May 26, 2016 3:35 pm

Good go at the homework Wendy. :)
David Campbell wrote:(I like your 'rhyme' for "pitch"!)
It's well known that Wendy is a lady of suitable decorum. ;) :)
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

User avatar
Shelley Hansen
Posts: 2269
Joined: Sun May 04, 2014 5:39 pm
Location: Maryborough, Queensland
Contact:

Re: homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by Shelley Hansen » Thu May 26, 2016 4:18 pm

Definitely felt the rocking and rolling as I read this, Wendy - nearly had to go and take a seasickness pill! :lol:

Very good!

Cheers
Shelley
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com

"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8156
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: homework we 6/06/16 - The Cruise.

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Fri May 27, 2016 10:53 am

Mate v Pitch threw me as well :roll: but eventually I got it. Such refinement :o :shock: is nice to see. Great use of the prompts Wen.
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Post Reply