w/e 09/01/12 remarkable woman

[Robyn]

I've been trying to play around with ideas, and have come up with this preliminary set of verses...

Remarkable woman


Remarkable woman, a union of souls,
a pair bound together with disparate goals.
Though time has swept grace from her delicate skin,
spectacular beauty is buried within.

Capriciously tossing in seasonal mood,
her silence is ominous, vengeance is crude;
her hair could be ripples of grain sown in beds,
or drought-ravaged tussocks from cancer-struck heads.

His threshing palms rupture, the whispered chaff flees;
he tastes of her ripeness, a kernel to please.
Her offspring are gathered with sharp, slicing combs
and tethered in silos, delinquents in homes.

Desiring the lubricant lotion of rain,
he bruises their friendship with cloven-hoofed pain;
then lanolined fingers part fibres with care,
with soft, supple brightness and crimping laid bare.

His vigorous, thrusting ideas catch her breath;
her overwrought answers cause danger and death.
Responding to texture and moisture of loams,
he searches for answers in leather-bound tomes;

but wisdom is waving from grasses and trees,
experienced fossils from Permian seas,
from waxed, arid pastures or rivers that prance-
a farm and her farmer in desperate dance.

(c) Robyn Sykes 2012

[Neville Briggs]

I didn't realise that those paddocks down the road were so sensual.

Interesting approach Robyn

[Maureen K Clifford]

Love it Robyn and especially liked these lines as one would expect

then lanolined fingers part fibres with care,
with soft, supple brightness and crimping laid bare.

Most people don't realize that wool is classed by brightness and crimp as well as staple and softness.

a pair bound together with disparate goals.

well defines the quandary farmers face when they wan't to do one thing but don't know for sure if the land will support the idea, but in times when one has to diversify or accept defeat you have to give it a go

I like this Farmer

His vigorous, thrusting ideas catch her breath;
her overwrought answers cause danger and death.
Responding to texture and moisture of loams,
he searches for answers in various tomes;

Just the sort of sun bronzed, muscled ,good looking farmer, leaning up against the slip rails or draped on his harvester in tight jeans that sells Calendars WHOO HOOO



Love it when people think outside the box and you certainly did with this one Well done

Cheers

Maureen

[Robyn]

Thanks Maureen and Neville.

[Heather]

A remarkable poem Robyn that shows your knowledge and love of the land. Beautiful imagery and I can hear you reciting it!

Heather

[Leonie]

I'm limiting myself to fewer words these days - so just .... Wow!!

[Robyn]

Thanks Heather and Leonie,
Sometimes when you go down a different track you don't know if you've found a dead-end or not, so I appreciate your comments.
And Maureen, I'm sure my grey-haired farmer would be delighted with the bronze muscly image!
Cheers
Robyn

[Glenny Palmer]

Robyn....this is outstanding. What a wonderful poet's mind you have. Thank you for sharing.

Glenny

[Robyn]

Ah Glenny, you've made my day. Thanks.
Because this was for a workshop I didn't put it away and come back to it as I would usually do... almost immediately after I posted I was unhappy with the last two lines, so I've just been back and edited them.
Robyn