For a Brass Monkey Night on the Water

[alongtimegone]

There’s red wine and there’s white wine.
There’s whiskey and there’s rum.
There’s vodka, gin and bourbon.
Hell!... I’ve only just begun.
There are beers to suit the multitudes.
Liqueurs of every shade.
And I must confess to sampling
almost every one they’ve made.
But when it comes to fishing
on a winter’s night. It’s handy,
to always have beneath the seat,
at least one bottle of brandy.

or rum … or vodka … or tequilla or ………….!

[Neville Briggs]

hmmm

[Heather]

Could be why you're not catching the fish Wazza

[Stephen Whiteside]

Jack and I went out last night
To fish. Alas, they wouldn't bite.
It didn't help to curse and pout.
At last we brought the brandy out.
A swig for Jack. A swig for me.
It helped our spirits mightily.
Another hearty swig for Jack
Seemed to bring his mojo back.
Another swig or two for me,
And we were half way to a spree.
We motored homeward to the pier,
And then I noticed something queer.
I hitched the boat up to the car
All by myself. It seemed to jar.
I could have sworn when I set out
There'd been another bloke about.
Too addled now for further thought,
Retreating from my night of sport,
I headed home and went to bed
(With dim thoughts, still, inside my head).
I woke at four. My God! How slack!
How could I have forgotten Jack?
I grabbed a trakkie and some thongs,
And went to right this worst of wrongs.
In dead of night I launched my boat,
And prayed that Jack knew how to float.
I drove in circles, round and round,
But not a trace of Jack I found.
I knew I was in dreadful strife.
What to say to Jack's poor wife?
Wife? Nay, widow! Let's be frank,
Because of all that stuff we drank.
I staggered up my garden path
(Oh, dreadful drinking aftermath!)
To find Jack's ragged form right there...
Asleep on my verandah chair!

[Heather]

You're a worry Stephen.

[Stephen Whiteside]

Well, it had a happy ending, Heather...like a fairy tale?

[Heather]

You are very mischieveous Stephen.

[Stephen Whiteside]

No I'm not! But I would make this point - while all fairy tales have happy endings, not all happy endings are fairy tales...

[r.magnay]

- while all fairy tales have happy endings, ...

...only if you are not a wolf, or a giant or an ogre or a witch or a.....

[Stephen Whiteside]

True enough. Maybe that's why they're called fairy tales and not ogre tales. When you think about it, most fairy tales don't have any fairies in them at all. Maybe it's the fairies that are telling the tales?