ABPA - Australian Bush Poets Association

I went for a walk over to the Woden Cemetary at lunch time and had a look at the remeberance walls that have been erected at some stage , I was taken by the way that the old soldiers were once again placed in ordered ranks , and the many empty places left on walls to be filled by veterans for years to come , I pictured the old veterans as waiting in ranks for their comarades who will follow


The Final parade

In ordered ranks they stand against the starkness of the wall
old diggers who have passed across to answer one last call
with bodies bowed not beaten they will stand beside their mates
For each and every soldier this battallion quietly waits

A piece of brass in memory , old soldiers from old wars
men once young who heard the call and rallied to a cause
who wait for new arrivals on their ordered wall of stone
ensuring that the new blokes are not left to fend alone

The empty walls remind us of the soldiers dying still
while the wars continue we all know these empty spots will fill
Old soldiers from the battles past will wait for those who fall
to take their place in ranks against the starkness of the wall

© Marty Boyce 2011

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Campfires, good company and a few beverages under a night sky , it doesnt get any better than that

Outstanding Marty. I found it a bit bumpy in places but nonetheless I think it is brilliant. With a bit of punctuation and a slight polish I think you have a stunning poem. Gold star material.

Heather

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Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away!

Agree with Heathers take on it Marty... brilliant, although I didn't find the potholes but did think perhaps this line might be smoother if you just relocated 'once' but consider that to be a speed bump



men young once, who heard the call and rallied to a cause

Cheers

Maureen

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Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


To the home of a friend the way is never long
the welcome is always warm and the Billy always on.

That line has 13 syllables whereas the others all appear to have 14 - little pot hole!

I think it is a brilliant poem. One of your best Marty.

Heather

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Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away!

Sorry Heather, the 'stress' count is seven, that verse is fine ...

Marty, in the third stanza - fourth verse ...
"to ensure that the new blokes are not left to fend alone "

"ensuring that the new blokes ... " or similar perhaps to smooth it out ??

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"If a picture paints a thousand words - that's Art!
However if a few words paint a thousand pictures - that's POETRY"
(Graham Fredriksen 1956 - 2010)

Oops, my mistake. Back to beginners' classes!

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Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take,
but by the moments that take our breath away!

NO! ... Advance 2 steps forward for trying to help out ...

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"If a picture paints a thousand words - that's Art!
However if a few words paint a thousand pictures - that's POETRY"
(Graham Fredriksen 1956 - 2010)

Pot holes better report them to the council. do not fix them yourself or you might find yourself in court.

Marty Liked it very much both the way you convey your message and the way the poem flows.

A good read Bob

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The purpose in life is to have fun.
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!

Brilliant Marty!

thanks everyone for the feedback , have had a bit of a dry spell of late and cemetarys seem to porvide a bit of inspiration
this one basically wrote itself

Marty

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Campfires, good company and a few beverages under a night sky , it doesnt get any better than that