My Dearest Bess. Revisited.
- Dave Smith
- Posts: 1726
- Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2010 9:12 pm
- Location: Collie W A
- Glenny Palmer
- Posts: 1816
- Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2010 12:47 am
Re: My Dearest Bess. Revisited.
Hello again Dave,
This is bonza. As a sometimes judge, I would view the last two lines almost as a post script...or an 'outro', just as we accept 'intro'. It's really good as is. I would suggest that you do enter it into a comp, & depending on the outcome, just keep entering it. Some event organisers/judges are responsible enough to offer brief feedback....which, IMHO is one of the primary reasons to have competitions.
Anyway...well done. I really enjoyed it.
Glenny
This is bonza. As a sometimes judge, I would view the last two lines almost as a post script...or an 'outro', just as we accept 'intro'. It's really good as is. I would suggest that you do enter it into a comp, & depending on the outcome, just keep entering it. Some event organisers/judges are responsible enough to offer brief feedback....which, IMHO is one of the primary reasons to have competitions.
Anyway...well done. I really enjoyed it.
Glenny
The purpose of my life is to serve as a warning to others.
- Dave Smith
- Posts: 1726
- Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2010 9:12 pm
- Location: Collie W A
Re: My Dearest Bess. Revisited.
Thanks Glenny I'm glad you enjoyed it, I will take your advice.
dave.
dave.
I Keep Trying
- Maureen K Clifford
- Posts: 8156
- Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
- Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
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Re: My Dearest Bess. Revisited.
Leonie and I were lucky enough to have a personal performance of Dave reciting this - believe me its bloody good and Dave puts it across really well....we all thoroughly enjoyed listening to his poems....and felt privileged to have the best seats in the house - front row no less




Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
- Dave Smith
- Posts: 1726
- Joined: Wed Nov 03, 2010 9:12 pm
- Location: Collie W A
Re: My Dearest Bess. Revisited.
Front row centre for moi.Maureen K Clifford wrote:the best seats in the house - front row no less![]()
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