The V-dub, the Mud and the Cow

[Cropduster]

THE V-DUB, THE MUD AND THE COW

Went camping down by Gloucester Creek
Been raining solid for a week
The dirt track in had clearly turned to mud

A place called Invergorden where
A dozen school mates camping there
Were clearly at the mercy of the Gods

Someone needed to take the bit
Between the teeth and show some grit
And drive out through the driving wind and rain

So Jimmy threw the gauntlet down
'I'll drive my V-dub into town
Who's with me? Come on, which of you is game?'

I had more guts than common sense
And looking back, in my defence
I'd rather go than stay without supplies

But hindsight is a futile tool
And now I feel like such a fool
For listening to Jimmy's lame advice

Before we even headed off
Jim warned me as the engine coughed
The motor was in urgent need of oil

You'd think that I'd hear warning bells
But all I said was 'What the hell
I'm sure we'll get there before the engine boils'

We headed off into the rain
We couldn't see a bloody thing
Visibility was down to nil

I said to Jim 'Just slow down mate
How am I supposed to navigate
When I can't see two feet beyond the flamin' grill

He shot me a sarcastic glare
Of course there is no grill out there
They put the V-dub motor in the rear

None-the-less I couldn't see
A foot or two in front of me
So the point I made was still perfectly clear

As I strained to look ahead
I saw this silhouette, I said
'If I'm not wrong, I think that there's a cow'

Jimmy hit the chocks, he did
But the beetle went into a skid
Right into the cow's rear end - 'Kapow!'

The cow sat back upon the bonnet
Which crumpled in when it sat on it
Then stood back up and walked off in the rain

We got out to take a look
The car was looking pretty crook
And we never saw that bloody cow again

Well we finally made it into town
Tracked a local dealer down
Got some oil and set off on our way

Our gallantry was wasted though
As luck would have it, wouldn't you know
The weather cleared up on that very day

Our friends all got out safe and sound
Not a bingle to be found
So our efforts were in vain, but what the heck

We had a story we could tell
Both of us were safe and well
But Jim's V-dub looked like a total wreck

Copyright (c) Allan Cropper January 2015

[Maureen K Clifford]

I can imagine the cow sitting on the VW bonnet and sliding straight off into an undignified heap - he was probably mortified, no wonder he walked off

[r.magnay]

...I'm gobsmacked Maureen!....you the gramma/ spelling police, missed the..common sence...(sense) and then called a cow a he!....

Quite humorous Allan...

[Maureen K Clifford]

my brain is overheated Ross and Bob keeps telling me to chill out I did miss them though but you didn't so all is well - Allan can now make the necessary corrections

[Heather]

Funny.

You might mean wasted rather than waisted though!

Heather

[Cropduster]

Thanks ladies

Common sense and wasted are now as they should be

My English teacher would have been a pauled

[alongtimegone]

Very funny yarn Allan.
Wazza