MY COMPETITION ENTRY

ABPA Financial members can post their Bush Poetry here ...
All Forum Visitors can view but only Financial ABPA Members can post and reply.
Neville Briggs
Posts: 6946
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Neville Briggs » Tue May 03, 2011 9:49 am

MY COMPETITION ENTRY

I've tried to please the judges with my rhyme,
and make a careful strict consistent metre.
It's hard to match the words for every time
that judges will be pleased to see a rhyme.
And they consider it a dreadful crime,
inserting substitutions in the metre.
I'll try to please the judges with my rhyme,
and make a careful strict consistent metre.
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8153
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Tue May 03, 2011 10:55 am

Think your needles stuck in the groove which ain't groovy :lol: :lol:
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Heather

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Heather » Tue May 03, 2011 1:43 pm

Well, Neville, I thought your rhyme was good except for the word metre. I'd try to find another word. Time, slime, mime, sublime, whine should work. Keep up the good work though, you'll get there eventually.

Heather :lol:

Neville Briggs
Posts: 6946
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Neville Briggs » Tue May 03, 2011 5:01 pm

Now I'll have to go in the dunce's corner :cry:
We all have to write some junk sometimes Marty, that's part of the learning process I think.


Maureen, It's just a little exercise in writing a triolet, which is a sort of round and that form requires repeated phrases.
It's not a story , just a bit of a play on words because the verse is in strict metre and rhyme. ;) trust me Heather :)
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

User avatar
Bob Pacey
Moderator
Posts: 7479
Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 9:18 am
Location: Yeppoon

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Bob Pacey » Tue May 03, 2011 5:48 pm

Whats that Neville a toilet ????

it is round on the top I know.

lost me

Bob
The purpose in life is to have fun.
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!

Neville Briggs
Posts: 6946
Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
Location: Here

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Neville Briggs » Tue May 03, 2011 6:29 pm

Tough audience to-night. :shock:
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8153
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Tue May 03, 2011 9:27 pm

No not tough Neville just challenged...now that you mention it I do remember that poetry form - didn't we have a go at it some time back? :oops: :oops: hence I am now mortally embarrassed because I didn't recognize it as such. I will go sit in the naughty corner and hang my head in shame :oops: :cry:
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Heather

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Heather » Wed May 04, 2011 9:13 am

Neville, I don't think I could trust anyone that hides behind a book...,mmmmm

Maureen, don't go there (the naughty corner) - you just never know who might be there...

User avatar
Bob Pacey
Moderator
Posts: 7479
Joined: Thu Dec 02, 2010 9:18 am
Location: Yeppoon

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Bob Pacey » Wed May 04, 2011 9:17 am

Come on in my little cherub.

I've made this pad my own.

Tv, Video, Computor, Fridge and of course pictures on the wall.

Got lots of tools and stuf.

Hang on this is not a naughty corner it's a bloody shed.

Yoe beauty
The purpose in life is to have fun.
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!

User avatar
Maureen K Clifford
Posts: 8153
Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
Contact:

Re: MY COMPETITION ENTRY

Post by Maureen K Clifford » Wed May 04, 2011 9:26 am

Now Bob was that invitation for me??? or for young Heather???? because she is the little cherub I am merely the wistful old woman according to he who shall be nameless because both his names are the same :lol:

If you meant me (be still my heart) I have always liked sheds and Bunnings is by far my most favourite :lol: store. (Batting eyelashes)
Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/


I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.

Post Reply