MIRTH

[Neville Briggs]

We have had the red sun in the bushfire smoke. I have tried several times to depict the moment in a painting, but so far without success. It's a very difficult impression to get right.

[Neville Briggs]

Heather, I had to have another read Heather and comment again
I'm very impressed.

I wouldn't say it was " lightweight", my impression is that you have laboured very hard over it. I think it is just right for the subject and sets the mood perfectly. Nothing else is required.

Maybe you should consider whether you have that special talent for childrens poetry. This one would look good with a little picure for a childrens book just like the mice in the barn That's my thought, you might think different.

[Robyn]

Heather I think this is great; reads really well!
Robyn

[Heather]

Thank you Neville and Robyn! You've both just made my day. I know it's not "bushy" but the images I see are of the Australian landscape.

I want to have leave enough room in my poems for the reader to fill in the gaps and make it their own.

Yes Neville, I did labour over it and fought to find the right words, then scrapped them and changed them again, and again....and just about broke the spine on my (large) thesaurus by using it so much. I hope it doesn't sound laboured though. I hadn't thought of it as a children's poem. I'd possibly like to add another stanza in the middle if I can think of something to go there. I did find the metre a little restrictive in places and originally had two unstressed words at the beginning of each line but ditched them for one.

Heather

[Neville Briggs]

Good on ya Heather.

No it doesn't look laboured. That's the paradox I suppose with art. If the artist puts in the hard yards, they make it look easy. I think that applies to any art, music, painting, dance, theatre, singing. writing and certainly, poetry.

I'm afraid for those who don't put in the required effort, then the laboured result; the struggle to produce the goods, is usually obvious.

[Heather]

Here you go. The sun sprinkling the tops of the trees at my place this evening. If I wait a bit longer it will be more dappled. So pretty! Very green for this time of the year. Any volunteers to come and fix that fence for me?

sprinkles the tips of the trees with her ligh.jpg

[Heather]

Ruffles of fragrance

wattle blossom.jpg

[Dave Smith]

Nice Poem, Nice pictures, Well done Heather.

TTFN

[Heather]

Thanks Dave. What about the fence though?

[Maureen K Clifford]

Hammer in some star pickets Heather - that will fix it - I think