Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
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- jakkimay
- Posts: 59
- Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 7:50 am
Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
‘When I Get on Stage to Recite’
When I get on stage to recite
my nerves are jangled and tight.
I sweat like a demon and feel like screamin’
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
I wonder – can they feel my plight?
as I stand there and twitch because of an itch
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
I hope I can be a delight
and the audience reaction won’t cause a distraction
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
it should be okay on the night.
I’ll just keep prayin’ that I don’t start swayin’
when I get on stage to recite.
Well, I got on stage to recite
and me poem went okay, despite
the thunderous clapping that kept them from napping
when I got on stage to recite.
And now that the gig has finally ended
I’m feeling okay – maybe a little suspended.
I wasn’t too nervous, didn’t do a disservice.
Maybe next time my act could be slightly extended.
© Jakki May
18.4.12
When I get on stage to recite
my nerves are jangled and tight.
I sweat like a demon and feel like screamin’
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
I wonder – can they feel my plight?
as I stand there and twitch because of an itch
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
I hope I can be a delight
and the audience reaction won’t cause a distraction
when I get on stage to recite.
When I get on stage to recite
it should be okay on the night.
I’ll just keep prayin’ that I don’t start swayin’
when I get on stage to recite.
Well, I got on stage to recite
and me poem went okay, despite
the thunderous clapping that kept them from napping
when I got on stage to recite.
And now that the gig has finally ended
I’m feeling okay – maybe a little suspended.
I wasn’t too nervous, didn’t do a disservice.
Maybe next time my act could be slightly extended.
© Jakki May
18.4.12
'Friendship is love without His wings!'
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Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
Very good jakkimay. I like way you have used the repeated line, I think that brings the poem together.
I think the last stanza is not needed, just my view, I reckon it works well without that. The poem bounces along really well but I think the last stanza doesn't bounce.
I think the last stanza is not needed, just my view, I reckon it works well without that. The poem bounces along really well but I think the last stanza doesn't bounce.
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.
- jakkimay
- Posts: 59
- Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 7:50 am
Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
Thanks Neville
I was contemplating that last verse myself.
Cheers
Jakki
I was contemplating that last verse myself.
Cheers
Jakki
'Friendship is love without His wings!'
Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
I like the repeat too Jakki. It has a good sound to it. Nice when you can find a good rhyming word!
Heather
Heather

- Bob Pacey
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Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
Yeah if you keep the last verse I would continue the same rhyme with recite.
Cheers Bob
Cheers Bob
The purpose in life is to have fun.
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!
After you grasp that everything else seems insignificant !!!
- jakkimay
- Posts: 59
- Joined: Fri Nov 05, 2010 7:50 am
Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
Thanks guys, I really appreciate your critiques, which are always taken on board.
Cheers
Jakki
Cheers
Jakki
'Friendship is love without His wings!'
- Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework w/e 23/4/12 'When I Get on Stage to Recite'
Good to see you having a play and a great effort - thanks Jakki
Cheers
Maureen
Cheers
Maureen
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http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.