The Lance Armstrong Limerick thread - please add

[Mal McLean]

There once was a man called Lance
With something red hot in his pants
It made him so fast he never came last
while riding around in old France.

He said ‘I’m the king of the road
and I’ll reap whatever I’ve sewed’
and the drugs that he took, the rotten big crook
are turning him into a toad.

[warooa]

For Lance could not be defeated
whenever the bloke competed.
From guilt or disparity he started a charity
knowing that he'd always cheated.

[Maureen K Clifford]

Perhaps dear moderators this could/should be moved to the collaborative poetry section

There once was a man called Lance
With something red hot in his pants
It made him so fast he never came last
while riding around in old France.

He said ‘I’m the king of the road
and I’ll reap whatever I’ve sewed’
and the drugs that he took, the rotten big crook
are turning him into a toad.
Mal_


For Lance could not be defeated
whenever the bloke competed.
From guilt or disparity he started a charity
knowing that he'd always cheated.
marty

For seven times Lance was a winner
and always old Lance was a grinner
but comeuppance came and it besmirched his name
His income streams now looking thinner
mkc

[Mariont3155]

But he wasn't the sole cheating rider
He had many a guilty offsider
Whose guts they now spill
As they too took a pill
And the circle spreads wider and wider

[Maureen K Clifford]

There once was a man called Lance
With something red hot in his pants
It made him so fast he never came last
while riding around in old France.

He said ‘I’m the king of the road
and I’ll reap whatever I’ve sewed’
and the drugs that he took, the rotten big crook
are turning him into a toad.
Mal_


For Lance could not be defeated
whenever the bloke competed.
From guilt or disparity he started a charity
knowing that he'd always cheated.
marty

For seven times Lance was a winner
and always old Lance was a grinner
but comeuppance came and it besmirched his name
His income streams now looking thinner
mkc


But he wasn't the sole cheating rider
He had many a guilty offsider
Whose guts they now spill
As they too took a pill
And the circle spreads wider and wider

MT

Followed close by a drug lab vehicular
with a probes trailing from regions testicular
he fell flat on his arse
as he saw Evans pass
boldly riding with fractured clavicular

MB

He was upright then not perpendicular
seemed not the least odd in particular;
held up as a saint – obviously he ain’t
now he’s known for schemes extra curricular
mkc

[Wendy Seddon]

There once was a man called Lance
With something red hot in his pants
It made him so fast he never came last
while riding around in old France.

He said ‘I’m the king of the road
and I’ll reap whatever I’ve sewed’
and the drugs that he took, the rotten big crook
are turning him into a toad.
Mal_

For Lance could not be defeated
whenever the bloke competed.
From guilt or disparity he started a charity
knowing that he'd always cheated.
marty

For seven times Lance was a winner
and always old Lance was a grinner
but comeuppance came and it besmirched his name
His income streams now looking thinner
mkc

But he wasn't the sole cheating rider
He had many a guilty offsider
Whose guts they now spill
As they too took a pill
And the circle spreads wider and wider
MT

Followed close by a drug lab vehicular
with a probes trailing from regions testicular
he fell flat on his arse
as he saw Evans pass
boldly riding with fractured clavicular
MB

He was upright then not perpendicular
seemed not the least odd in particular;
held up as a saint – obviously he ain’t
now he’s known for schemes extra curricular
mkc

Lance tried his hardest to thwart
The judgement of rules he had wrought,
Shame Lancey shame for not playing the game
Your efforts have all come to nought!
Wen