Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Moderator: Shelley Hansen
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Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Unjust condemnation?
He’d lived a wayward life for countless years, that showed in many ways,
appearing to be under some controlling influence, these days
But was it from the grog, or something far more sinister I mused?
for ever since he’d seen the Min Min lights, his mind had seemed confused.
As though he’d had a sleeping sickness, that’s in danger of relapse,
a sickness of the mind, that caused hypnotic somnolence perhaps!
Was he to be just cast aside for life - for no one seemed to care?
And would he suffer from now on - a shorter sentence would seem fair.
A little bit of charity would be in order, don’t you think?
and not condemned by us, because we reckoned it was caused by drink.
He’d been a war time hero once, and so, there’s nothing left to prove;
his names engraved upon a statue here, and statues never move.
©T.E. Piggott
He’d lived a wayward life for countless years, that showed in many ways,
appearing to be under some controlling influence, these days
But was it from the grog, or something far more sinister I mused?
for ever since he’d seen the Min Min lights, his mind had seemed confused.
As though he’d had a sleeping sickness, that’s in danger of relapse,
a sickness of the mind, that caused hypnotic somnolence perhaps!
Was he to be just cast aside for life - for no one seemed to care?
And would he suffer from now on - a shorter sentence would seem fair.
A little bit of charity would be in order, don’t you think?
and not condemned by us, because we reckoned it was caused by drink.
He’d been a war time hero once, and so, there’s nothing left to prove;
his names engraved upon a statue here, and statues never move.
©T.E. Piggott
- Catherine Lee
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Oh well done,Terry! These prompts are a really tough challenge, and yet you've nailed it as ever, and so quickly too! Love the last lines x
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Thanks Catherine
Sometimes as you know, a rough idea pops quickly into your mind,
of which you can with luck, fashion into an almost believable yarn.
On other occasions unfortunately the mind refuses to cooperate,
and I suspect we've all suffered that - well I know I have anyway.
Cheers
Terry
Sometimes as you know, a rough idea pops quickly into your mind,
of which you can with luck, fashion into an almost believable yarn.
On other occasions unfortunately the mind refuses to cooperate,
and I suspect we've all suffered that - well I know I have anyway.
Cheers
Terry
- Maureen K Clifford
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation


Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Thanks Maureen
Don't ask we where that one came from!
I was looking at your prompts and though, how the hell am I going to use them and make sense.
Anyway I was thinking the hardest one (for me anyway) was going to the Hypnotic Somnolence one.
So I started messing around with that, and then it all just seemed to fall into place.
It was only after I'd finished, that I realized that I'd left out the sustenance one - damn it!
Terry
Don't ask we where that one came from!
I was looking at your prompts and though, how the hell am I going to use them and make sense.
Anyway I was thinking the hardest one (for me anyway) was going to the Hypnotic Somnolence one.
So I started messing around with that, and then it all just seemed to fall into place.
It was only after I'd finished, that I realized that I'd left out the sustenance one - damn it!
Terry
- Maureen K Clifford
- Posts: 8156
- Joined: Tue Nov 09, 2010 10:31 am
- Location: Ipswich - Paul Pisasale country and home of the Ipswich Poetry Feast
- Contact:
Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Well there is no obligation to use them all Terry -
- sometimes people only use one prompt and that is fine.

Check out The Scribbly Bark Poets blog site here -
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
http://scribblybarkpoetry.blogspot.com.au/
I may not always succeed in making a difference, but I will go to my grave knowing I at least tried.
- Shelley Hansen
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Top job, Terry! Really well written, with an unusual rhythm.
Like Catherine said, I reckon you've absolutely nailed it with that last line in particular.
Cheers
Shelley
Like Catherine said, I reckon you've absolutely nailed it with that last line in particular.
Cheers
Shelley
Shelley Hansen
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
Lady of Lines
http://www.shelleyhansen.com
"Look fer yer profits in the 'earts o' friends,
fer 'atin' never paid no dividends."
(CJ Dennis "The Mooch o' Life")
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Hi Maureen
Yes I know, and often do myself, but once I managed to get started with this one,
I decided to try and use the all - missed it... by that much!
Terry
Yes I know, and often do myself, but once I managed to get started with this one,
I decided to try and use the all - missed it... by that much!
Terry
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Re: Homework Sept 2019 Unjust Condemnation
Hi Shelley and thanks.
Yes I know what you mean, some of the lines seem to be almost two lines in one,
or at least change direction.
I tossed up whether to use semi colons, not sure it would have much though.
I guess homework is a good opportunity to experiment.
Terry
Yes I know what you mean, some of the lines seem to be almost two lines in one,
or at least change direction.
I tossed up whether to use semi colons, not sure it would have much though.
I guess homework is a good opportunity to experiment.
Terry