O.K. another drunken rambling from me.
I don't really know how this came about, I think I was trying to explore the Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde duality. But I wrote this while drinking , so maybe it isn't hitting the mark like I hoped it would.Please leave a comment and let me know.
Hidden incognito
Twixt a lumbered sanity,
‘Tween falsified bravado
Nestles ones’ duality,
Small in mind and wonder
As the senses feather thin,
Generally encumbered
By the accolades we win.
Foraged through the annals
Of a mind I left behind,
Scrounged through the channels
Of a place I’ll never find.
Thy septum of normalcy
Conjoining two to one,
Incite a lone duality
I shan’t recover from.
Avertedly impotent
From the other side of me,
Decisively component
Birthing schism silently,
Till realization hungers
Via sheer conformity,
Painfully in slumber
I shall meet duality.
30/6/2012
© Copyright 2012 Adam Parker
Duality
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warooa
Re: Duality
Well it sounds bloody brilliant to me, Adam . . . though I've been on the sauce since midday 
Marty
Marty
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Neville Briggs
- Posts: 6946
- Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
- Location: Here
Re: Duality
Interesting Adam.
Not going too bad in some places.
I wondered about using the archaic thy. Not usually favoured in contemporary practice
In the 7th line of the second stanza you talk about a lone duality, isn't duality a doubling up, not lone, that seems an oxymoron to me, maybe I read it wrong ???
Not going too bad in some places.
I wondered about using the archaic thy. Not usually favoured in contemporary practice
In the 7th line of the second stanza you talk about a lone duality, isn't duality a doubling up, not lone, that seems an oxymoron to me, maybe I read it wrong ???
Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.
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DinkyDi
Re: Duality
G'day Neville,
I was a bit dubious about using "thy" myself from what I recall I was thinking at the time. It simply just seemed to fit better I think.
As for Incite a lone duality
I pretty much meant two personalities trapped together to form one. Sort of a play on the words I guess.
Another interesting fact is a local singer song writer Richard Ofsoski read it and has asked if I mind if he turns it into a song. He does normally sing heavy metal but of late has been doing a lot Latin flamingo type guitar work, so I'll be interested to see what he does with it.
I was a bit dubious about using "thy" myself from what I recall I was thinking at the time. It simply just seemed to fit better I think.
As for Incite a lone duality
I pretty much meant two personalities trapped together to form one. Sort of a play on the words I guess.
Another interesting fact is a local singer song writer Richard Ofsoski read it and has asked if I mind if he turns it into a song. He does normally sing heavy metal but of late has been doing a lot Latin flamingo type guitar work, so I'll be interested to see what he does with it.
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Neville Briggs
- Posts: 6946
- Joined: Sun Oct 31, 2010 12:08 pm
- Location: Here
Re: Duality
Interesting Adam.
There was a mad TV show years ago called Sledge Hammer, ( a send up of Dirty Harry )
In one scene the over-the-top redneck cop Inspector Hammer bursts in on the suspected crooks who are a loud heavy metal rock group. He points his 44 magnum revolver at them and yells at them something like " turn it off you scum suckers, and freeze you verminous maggots before I blow you all away".
The band turns off and one of the guitarists leans over and says to Hammer " Have you ever thought of writing lyrics " Well I thought it was funny.
There was a mad TV show years ago called Sledge Hammer, ( a send up of Dirty Harry )
In one scene the over-the-top redneck cop Inspector Hammer bursts in on the suspected crooks who are a loud heavy metal rock group. He points his 44 magnum revolver at them and yells at them something like " turn it off you scum suckers, and freeze you verminous maggots before I blow you all away".
The band turns off and one of the guitarists leans over and says to Hammer " Have you ever thought of writing lyrics "
Well I thought it was funny.Neville
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.
" Prose is description, poetry is presence " Les Murray.